To Gym Owners and Staff-Please remember!

Date: Wed Nov 15 5:57 PM, 2006

To Gym Owners and Staff-Please remember!

Date: Wed Nov 15 6:43 PM, 2006

Amen Sister, you said a mouthful . Couldn't have said it better. I was very lucky that the 2 teams my daugher has been on both treated parents well.

Date: Wed Nov 15 6:56 PM, 2006

Wow, this is a very good subject. Let's hear from all those cheer parents out there.

Date: Wed Nov 15 9:26 PM, 2006

I agree with everything said by Proud Parent. I hope ALL gym owners and coaches read this and soon... and know some of you are on here so you will, please think about it...
This thread is awseome and please think about what was said by the original thread!! We just WANT to be here to support the kids and the gym, your gym! It will bring your gym success if you realize it all...

Thanks for posting Proud Parent! Thanks for making the effort for an awesome post.

Date: Wed Nov 15 9:40 PM, 2006

I completely agree with you Proud Parent. Every parent should be respected and given credit for all their hard work. At our gym, we involve the parents in everything going on in the gym. It is very important to any child to have their parents involved and having the owners and coaches involve them. Parents need to be respected, they do a lot for their kids and this isn't a cheap sport. RESPECT IS NEEDED! Our gym is proud to keep our families close, they are all great to talk to and include. Great post!

Date: Wed Nov 15 11:51 PM, 2006

I too am a long time cheer parent and we have responsibilities to the team that go way beyond paying the bills. Here is a list of DON"TS for cheer parents that may make it a little easier to get along with coaches and gym owners.

DON"T:
-Question the coaches authority or decisions in front of the kids, it causes doubt in the kids.
-Yell at your child from across the floor during practice, it is distracting and embarassing.
-Question the routine, that's why we have expensive choreography.
-Argue about hairbows 5 minutes before a competition, timing is everything.
-Blame the coach if the team loses, move to another gym if you are not happy.
-sit in the vewing room and gossip, it causes animosity amongst families.
-think that your child is the best, or only one on the team, it is a team, everyone has their part.

THE DO"S.....

DO:
-Support the coaches in front of the kids, if you have questions, ask in private.
-Cheer, don't criticize.
-Get to know one another in the viewing room, it creates unity.

There is a reason that coaches and owners shut parents out and it's usually because a few bad apples cause so much disharmony that in the interest of the team, the club has to protect the kids. At my gym if I have a problem I schedule a meeting ( not during regular practice!!!) and all my questions and concerns are addressed. If this is not the case with you, maybe it's time to move on to somewhere that you are more comfortable. After all, this cheer thing is a huge committment and it's better not to waste your time.

Date: Thu Nov 16 12:22 AM, 2006

Was it really necessary to post this. Everyone knows that parents pay the bills and they are their to support their child. That's not even a question, but some parents abuse that right by habitually questioning everything. Would I go into your job and question everything, no. So give the same rights and freedoms you would like. I think its great to support your kids, but give them some breathing room. To be honest isn't this about the kids and THEIR happiness. I think people really lose sight in that. Some of the TOP gyms have closed practices and really set limits on what they can do. Paying tuition doesn't gurantee a right to get anyting you want. You are paying for training, clothing, and competition fees. I ENCOURAGE participation but supportive not distractive.

Date: Thu Nov 16 8:41 AM, 2006

I agree with the last two posts. We've already had the "parents rights" posts... it seems that whenever some incident happens at a gym that bothers a parent, they come on this board and start to preach how they are a paying customer, etc... But this is a case where if you are a paying customer and you're unhappy, taking your business elsewhere doesn't just impact YOU. Question, is your daughter happy? Does she enjoy it at this gym? Because that is all it should be about, truly. Your happiness doesn't matter here, sorry. If your daughter is happy at this gym, you'll just have to deal with any annoyances (like looks from coaches that you interpret to mean they don't want you watching). Maybe they do, maybe they don't. Some gyms don't allow it. Again, are you going to pull your child out because you can't watch? Most level headed parents would not.

I'm a parent, not a coach or owner by the way. You can tell a lot about a person by the way they post. To be brutally honest, you are the type of parent I would dread having at the gym, because your idea of just being supportive doesn't match the kind of support the coaches really need. You're not about making their jobs easier, you're all about what rights you have as a paying customer.

Take away the parties, the gifts, the goodie bags, etc... -- a good gym with good coaches will still draw girls in. I don't pay money for that, I pay for the skills my daughter is getting. If I want all that other stuff and if it's all about being social, I'll put my daughter back into pop warner. Please don't feel the coaches or owners owe you anything for all that extra stuff that has nothing to do with how the girls do at competitions. From one parent to another.

Date: Thu Nov 16 8:49 AM, 2006

It is amazing how people can find negative about ANYTHING! This thread is as legit as any other and the poster has every right to her opinion. Nothing rude was said and it is true for them so why feel a need to belittle them? That is what I find rude, un-necessary and offensive! But hey, that's just me!

Date: Thu Nov 16 8:59 AM, 2006

holy cow wrote:

It is amazing how people can find negative about ANYTHING! This thread is as legit as any other and the poster has every right to her opinion. Nothing rude was said and it is true for them so why feel a need to belittle them? That is what I find rude, un-necessary and offensive! But hey, that's just me!

We are saying this topic has been beaten to DEATH. Isn't it just obvious that parents need to be supportive and pay for their kids to train. I don't know why people have to state the obvious time and time again. Deal with your issues in a mature. Many of the habits the parents do, pass down to the kids.

Date: Thu Nov 16 9:17 AM, 2006

I think most gym owners would agree that they'd rather have an unhappy parent/child leave their program than spread their negativity.

Date: Thu Nov 16 9:30 AM, 2006

I think you can have a happy medium.

This is how we do it. It may not work for all but it's a start!

At the beginning of the year, we ask for 75.00 for the bosster club. The kids get this....

1 gift (given at Showcase, this year was a bling OC shirt)
5.00 for each party allowed X 5
1 DVD at the end of the year
Paid dinner for both Las Vegas and the banquet.

The team reps are instructed to NOT REQUIRE any more during the year. Now, you CAN have a potluck at any one of your parties and ASK if anyone would like to help, but no one HAS to do it. (most parents are happy to though). Also, you don't HAVE to have 5 parties, but you MUST have 2. The party money can be spent in any way the team sees fit. We do not allow goodie bags at any competition any more. Some teams were doing more than others and it was becoming unfair. So now, if they want to give their team something, it has to be done at a party or outside of the gym and competitions. The gym provides water for the kids at competitions.

This works for us and the parents who can not or do not want to give more, do not have to. And their child doesn't miss out on anything. It's worked sooooooo well so far and we aren't nickled and dimed.

Just an idea. Nothing more.

OC Mom

Date: Thu Nov 16 10:05 AM, 2006

To Proud Parent:
I agree with you !
I don't know why some gyms treat the parents so poorly. I would think a good group of parents could really help an All-Star gym. I believe you can always tell if a gym is a happy gym from not only on the mats from the cheerleaders, but also from the stands at a competition from the parents.

To Necessary:
I do believe that it is necessary to remind some gyms that the parents do pay a lot of money!
I really don't think that was Proud Parents point; it is just that facts!

To Agree:
You sound like a owner or coach to me and that is OK! Remember Proud Parent might not be talking about your gym. She is talking about what is going on at her gym and how some of the parents are feeling. It is about Respect and Communication!

To Jacki owner of NCP:
You got it going ON! You get it! It is about Respect and it goes both ways! I bet your parents are very proud to be part of your gym! Good Luck!

Date: Thu Nov 16 10:18 AM, 2006

I LOVE MY PARENTS! I am a coach/director of a program and LOVE the parent support. If its focused on being positive then its great.

Date: Thu Nov 16 11:22 AM, 2006

I agree with you proud parent. There is no reason to attack her. After all the posts about gyms with coaches being arrested for inappropraiate behavior I will NEVER AND I MEAN NEVER go to a gym that dosen't allow parents to view practices. My kids have been to gyms that have made me feel not welcome. (Like this parent says). I stay away from the gossip and the coaches. I give them nothing but respect. Some gyms are like this they don't want parents around but they sure want your kids and your money. We have been to both kinds and have left the ones that don't seem to like the parents. I have always said this is bussiness. If you want to run a sucessful business especially one that deals with kids you have to learn to deal with parents . Maybe there should be a class on that for coaches and gym owners.The most sucessful gyms seem to get it right. There will always be unhappy parents but I beleive that there is a gym for everyone out there. If you don't like the way one is then by all means go to another until you find one that fits you.

Date: Thu Nov 16 2:18 PM, 2006

You know the majority of the TOP gyms in the country do not allow open practices until exhibition time. Some top gyms do, but the point is for them to focus. Would you watch your son play football everyday, NO.

Date: Thu Nov 16 3:14 PM, 2006

I'm a parent, and the parents at our gym who are supportive in the best way possible are the ones who help out when asked, stay out of the way when asked, get the girls to practice on time, and give the coaches whatever they need to help coach them. We respect them and know they're doing a great job with our program; if they would rather we don't watch practice because it's too distracting, we completely understand and back off. The priority at our gym is to develop their skills and teach them to work together as a team. Not to cater to the parents. Teachers wouldn't want you staring through the window of their classrooms, try to think of it along the same lines. Trust them, and if you don't, it's definitely time to find another gym.

Date: Thu Nov 16 8:38 PM, 2006

Previous Post:
I'm a parent, and the parents at our gym who are supportive in the best way possible are the ones who help out when asked, stay out of the way when asked, get the girls to practice on time, and give the coaches whatever they need to help coach them. We respect them and know they're doing a great job with our program; if they would rather we don't watch practice because it's too distracting, we completely understand and back off. The priority at our gym is to develop their skills and teach them to work together as a team. Not to cater to the parents. Teachers wouldn't want you staring through the window of their classrooms, try to think of it along the same lines. Trust them, and if you don't, it's definitely time to find another gym.

Proud Parents post:
My issue is not about viewing or not viewing practices. I also do whatever the gym asks of. I have never crossed the line. I'm always ready and willing to help when needed. If the gym didn't want me to view; I wouldn't. I have no problem with that.
Maybe I didn't make myself clear.
My post was more to ask gym owners and staff to appreciate the parents that are Dedicated and do step up and help. Is a little Respect and Kindness to much to ask? I don't think so! My above Message was not to bash or to be mean to the gym that I belong to. I was hoping that if Gym Owners and Staff members read this message that they would realized that parents are an addition to the gym and they also wants what is best for the gym.
Again, I will say that when parents feel disconnected or feel like a nuisance, than it makes it very difficult to want to support or be pat of that gym.
Trust is not the issue either. I very much trust the staff at my gym, but just some of the things I hear and see make me disappointed.
Maybe this is normal behavior for all cheerleading gyms and maybe I'm wrong.
I guess the question we have to ask ourselves is: Are we entitled to better treatment and is this the gym for my daughter?

Date: Fri Nov 17 8:08 AM, 2006

I think this might be just a difference between youth and all stars. I don't know how long you've been with all stars, but I did find a big difference when we made the move. You're not dealing with people (coaches, directors) who are just parents stepping up to volunteer. These are professionals with a different goal in mind, to compete against other teams and hopefully win. Not the goal at all when we were with pop warner, not even close. So at pop warner we had a lot of other parents volunteering to do all the other stuff (parties, those gift bags you had to hand out to the other teams, etc...). And we'd sit on the bleachers (sometimes) and watch them practice. But it was very low key, and all the other fluff was needed because they really didn't have much else. Not the case now. It might be a rude awakening for some parents, who used to be hands on, helping out, feeling more like a part of the team themselves. Here's one last thought, I have never heard of any parent pulling their child out of a gym because the parent felt neglected or not appreciated. If your child is happy there and you feel your child is getting what you hoped out of this experience, that should be all that matters. Coaches and owners just have too many other things to think about. And no, I'm not a coach or an owner, I'm a parent just like you. So if you feel you're not appreciated, as much as you may not like it, you have to think there could be worse things about this gym, and consider yourself lucky if everything else is going right. Just another opinion.

Date: Sun Nov 19 11:56 AM, 2006

On the other hand... wrote:

I too am a long time cheer parent and we have responsibilities to the team that go way beyond paying the bills. Here is a list of DON"TS for cheer parents that may make it a little easier to get along with coaches and gym owners.

DON"T:
-Question the coaches authority or decisions in front of the kids, it causes doubt in the kids.
-Yell at your child from across the floor during practice, it is distracting and embarassing.
-Question the routine, that's why we have expensive choreography.
-Argue about hairbows 5 minutes before a competition, timing is everything.
-Blame the coach if the team loses, move to another gym if you are not happy.
-sit in the vewing room and gossip, it causes animosity amongst families.
-think that your child is the best, or only one on the team, it is a team, everyone has their part.

THE DO"S.....

DO:
-Support the coaches in front of the kids, if you have questions, ask in private.
-Cheer, don't criticize.
-Get to know one another in the viewing room, it creates unity.

There is a reason that coaches and owners shut parents out and it's usually because a few bad apples cause so much disharmony that in the interest of the team, the club has to protect the kids. At my gym if I have a problem I schedule a meeting ( not during regular practice!!!) and all my questions and concerns are addressed. If this is not the case with you, maybe it's time to move on to somewhere that you are more comfortable. After all, this cheer thing is a huge committment and it's better not to waste your time.

YES