Nosey People

Date: Mon Sep 29 8:43 PM, 2008

RE: Nosey People

Date: Mon Sep 29 8:45 PM, 2008

Anonymous wrote:

How about if the male is gender specific ? Like if its a male that likes males ? Would that be a problem

What?

Date: Mon Sep 29 9:35 PM, 2008

like if the coach is gay, is it ok to tal to girls. i am pretty sure that is what they are trying to get at.

flipkidjudge · Senior Member

The gender or sexual orientation is irrelevant to the original question posed by the original poster. No adult (18 or over) in an official role or unofficial role should be calling minors(whether male or female) from other gyms seeking to get information about that gym. If they want to know about the gym call the coaches or owners. If they are considering switching gyms and are informally evaluating the talent and where they might fit in, go visit the gym yourself. If they are trying to recruit or drive drama (which is why people don't usually like my position on this...messes up their "plans" one way or the other) then call the parents.

Date: Tue Sep 30 4:04 AM, 2008

I am thinking no coach (male/female) should call any 12 / 13 year old because it shows poor judgement and inappropriate boundaries. Poor judgment in one area of a person's life usally spills over. If an adult coach is so stupid to think it is okay to call a kid, it is likely they will use poor judgement at other times while working with the kids. Will they be one of those 'cool' coaches who think it is okay to drink with the teenage cheerleaders. Will they be one of the stupid ones who decides it is okay to have sex with an underage cheerleader. Will they think it is okay to talk about how they got drunk last weekend in a practice room full of impressionable ears. Just examples. Maybe they are not that stupid, but all I will have seen is that they think it is okay to call a little kid...so what else will they think is okay???

Ultimately, the goal to recruit a new cheerleaders calls for the parent to pay tuition...that's who they should be calling. If they called my kid first, I would tell them they are untrustworthy since they don't respect boundaries.

Daughter goes to camp for 3 weeks every summer. Counselors are not allowed to give out phone #, email or any internet account (myspace) etc. because contact BEYOND camp is inappropriate! Duh.

Date: Tue Sep 30 8:15 AM, 2008

I know some, "UNCLASSY" people like that. If you have to spend time spying on other programs and what they are doing, it just shows that you don't know what you are doing. People should grow up and recognize how truly ridiculous they really are.

Date: Tue Sep 30 10:20 AM, 2008

It shows insecurity in one's own program. If people are secure in their own program they would have no reason to try to find out what this gym is doing or that gym is doing. They wouldn't be concentrating on recruiting people from other gyms. They would simply worry about their own gym and what they are doing to make sure they have the best season they can possibly have.

Date: Tue Sep 30 7:34 PM, 2008

what if its coaches texting kids within their own program. and not as young as 12. more like 14 and above. or coaches simply texting kids to remind them of private lessons or practices or to wish them good luck at a competition that they can't attend.

Date: Tue Sep 30 7:58 PM, 2008

i dont see a problem with things like that. To tell you the truth i dont see a problem with kids thlking to their coaches. I talk to my coaches all the time in myspace, on the phone, text messages. I see them as my family so i talk to then just as much hmm

Date: Tue Sep 30 8:45 PM, 2008

I think as rational adults we all know what is and is not appropriate. it dosen't take a rocket scientist. It's called using good sense!!!

Date: Wed Oct 1 2:57 AM, 2008

They are YOUR coaches, not random stranger coaches.

.

Date: Thu Oct 2 10:23 AM, 2008

NO!

Date: Thu Oct 2 11:11 AM, 2008

flipkidjudge wrote:

I apologize in advance if this sounds jaded or rough...

If any coach or twenty year old male texted or called my daughter seeking information on our program or trying to recruit her over I would be in jail the next day cause I would go and shove the phone straight where the sun don't shine. And I say that knowing that cheerleaders from other programs have tried to recruit her (and knowing I coach for another program)...but when she finishes with them, they won't talk to her no more about anything, let alone cheer...lol.

IMHO too many coaches use kids as pawns in their never ending quest for cheer domination, to get information that they can readily find out if they would just wait for competition, or to try to weaken a competitor. They duck behind the why can't the kids talk defense, when they are the ones that told the kid to call/text/message to try to get information and bring it back to the gym. (the one that irritate me the most was a coach using a kids phone to talk to another kid to try to recruit him...only thing is the coach did not know he was on speakerphone at the time...rofl!!!) What teams do they have, how do they look, what kinda skills they really have...who cares? Wait till competition season and all will be revealed.

On a serious note I feel this is one of the unspoken great divides in this sport. Many gyms feel this behavior is ok especially when it is the larger established gyms picking off from the building gyms, while many others feel they are not regardless to the size of the gym. One day the smaller gyms are going to realize they do not have to put up with this type of behavior or have to resort to the same tactics, will band together and form another organization to better meet their needs. And they won't be able to be bought out by Varsity either.

Edited to add: I realze that there are many people who are 100% innocent in the questions they ask about other teams/programs and you mean no harm or ill will. It is sad that because of the people who operate as above, most programs tend to shut everybody out. I have always maintained that those who want to truly know about our program can get in touch with me privately, as some have.

-- Edited by flipkidjudge at 05:22, 2008-09-29

-- Edited by flipkidjudge at 06:58, 2008-09-29

oooohh oooh, call on me!

I know a team that does this in NC. they are the diva's in TEAL AND BLACK.

Gotta admit, STEALING KIDS is kinda whack. especially when you get caught.

haha gotta love ya Court!

yes, i went there with this issue, because it happens too much and you never get caught!

flipkidjudge · Senior Member

Let me be perfectly clear. There are problems within our industry that all you have to do is call any gym in any state and they could probably tell you about similar problems there. I have talked with coaches from California, Texas, New Jersey, South Carolina, NC, VA and so on and if you say a certain problem they could identify it because it either happened to them, they are dealing with it currently, or they have been accused of doing it. To me that does not make it a one gym issue or a geographical issue but an industry issue.

Date: Thu Oct 2 3:59 PM, 2008

Texting kid bad bad bad bad.

However, no team could steal my kid either. I would have to want to let her be stolen.