I may be jumping the gun on this one, and I hope you are talking about at the gym. but I feel we as parents should never have to explain this to our children, if you are paying the same money as the "favorites" and it's affecting your kid in any way (back of routine , stunting etc) leave the gym! We pay them to treat our kids fair and to be unbiased. The gym we left had so may kids leave for the same reason and at the end of the day, all that was left were the "favorites" but the "talent" bounced. To me this applies to all rules of life, Teacher's, job's ( we all know the favorite at work doesn't do any work) etc.

Hope this help's Probaly way more than what you were asking for

Anonymous wrote:

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yes. Playing favorite at the gym. Putting the favorites infront of every section no matter on skill, hard work and dedication. 

It is pretty sad that a coach would let their personal feelings out on a child no matter what others say or do.  Really, how can anyone prove that the coach is playing favorites though?
 

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Sadly when coaches have this behavior, it's no secret everybody knows, but when the kids figure it out especially when thier young, my 7 year old came home and told me, " I don't think my coach likes me" you know it's time to go!! So the only proof you need is from your child, because this is an extra-curricular activity, Who want's to pay money for thier kids to feel like crap? Pay someone with the buisness sense to know favorites don't pay the bills.

Anonymous wrote:

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Did you ever consider that they are always in the front because they are better than your child. I know it is hard to see but sometimes it is hard to tell your kid that they not as good as the others that are in front.  Maybe they are in the back because their jumps are low or motions are off. Most coaches would like to do the best that they can and put the best in the front. That is just good coaching, not favorites as parents complain about

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There are rare occasions when this is true, but if you look around you will find the majority of these "favorite" kids have no talent so they become good at kissing up and have their mommys in the gym buying food, drinks, working the back desk and kissing up too to ensure there kid a front spot and most coaches (since they are all so hungry and coaching provides them with no money) They overlook talent to be feed.

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

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Did you ever consider that they are always in the front because they are better than your child. I know it is hard to see but sometimes it is hard to tell your kid that they not as good as the others that are in front.  Maybe they are in the back because their jumps are low or motions are off. Most coaches would like to do the best that they can and put the best in the front. That is just good coaching, not favorites as parents complain about

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There are rare occasions when this is true, but if you look around you will find the majority of these "favorite" kids have no talent so they become good at kissing up and have their mommys in the gym buying food, drinks, working the back desk and kissing up too to ensure there kid a front spot and most coaches (since they are all so hungry and coaching provides them with no money) They overlook talent to be feed.

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OMG, can we say petty. Honestly I don't know any coach who would put someone who is not talented in the front, for ANY reason, especially in all star cheerleading. I think you really need to open up your eyes and see a routine from a judges perspective and not a parents. Also, since when did a coach owe you a specific spot. When I cheered, I just had the attitude to be happy to be on the team at all. Now, parents reinfoce the idea to their kids that if they are not dead center then they are bad. You have to work to get put into specific spots, which are earned.  You should also respect your coach and program enough that each child is treated with respect and should respect their spot on the team.

When did all of you parents become coaches? Do you really think as a parent that you know EVERYTHING that goes into becoming a cheerleader? What judges are looking for? Do you know all the technique that goes into becoming a flyer? Do you know what a 2 count transition is? Having that been said, someone that is in the front of the cheer will have to remain in the front if jumps and/or dance follows because there is not time to transition someone all the way to the front? Before you jump to conclusions that coaches are getting free food or whatever, step back and try to look at it as a coach and everything that goes into a routine.

Anonymous wrote:

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When did all of you parents become coaches? Do you really think as a parent that you know EVERYTHING that goes into becoming a cheerleader? What judges are looking for? Do you know all the technique that goes into becoming a flyer? Do you know what a 2 count transition is? Having that been said, someone that is in the front of the cheer will have to remain in the front if jumps and/or dance follows because there is not time to transition someone all the way to the front? Before you jump to conclusions that coaches are getting free food or whatever, step back and try to look at it as a coach and everything that goes into a routine.

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Exactly I love cheer parents, but why is it some parents come off as the authority on cheerleading. I watch other sports to but I am not going to approach the coaches and tell them my child needs to do this and that. I think thats why in Youth Socceer they have the policy about no sideline coaching.

Anonymous wrote:

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When did all of you parents become coaches? Do you really think as a parent that you know EVERYTHING that goes into becoming a cheerleader? What judges are looking for? Do you know all the technique that goes into becoming a flyer? Do you know what a 2 count transition is? Having that been said, someone that is in the front of the cheer will have to remain in the front if jumps and/or dance follows because there is not time to transition someone all the way to the front? Before you jump to conclusions that coaches are getting free food or whatever, step back and try to look at it as a coach and everything that goes into a routine.

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I experenced this in the reverse, Parents were crying because my kid was in the front, SELLING that damn routine, so they tried to put her in the back JUST to please the other parents crying cuz they wanted to see thier kid to be in the front. So I bounced her right out that gym!!! NOW THEY BETTER BE GLAD THEY DON'T HAVE A TEAM IN OUR DIVISION, CUZ MY DAUGHTER'S IN THE FRONT SELLING SOMEONE ELSE ROUTINE!!! so at competitions it's going to take all I have not to scream " She sells b******" When I see the coaches walking by....... Okay so I will scream it inside, no getto drama at compeitions!!!!!

From a coaches stand point, and something a very wise coach once told me... "someone always has to be in the back." Straight foward I know, but true. I would hope a child would not be punished or rewarded regarding the coaches relationship with the parent. That's just silly. I am close to many parents in the gym, but I always put that kid where they are best as far as the routine goes. As kids get older they will shine whether it be in tumbling, dancing, jumps, or stunting. Or all of the above. So as a coach you have to put kids where it best fits. And if you happen to have a child that is good at all of the above that kid may be looked at as a favorite. It's not favorites, it's just that that particular child is good all around.

This certain problem came up last year for me, and I told the parent(s) to just wait. Each child will grow into their own, and eventually have their time to shine. This year that child is excelling and she is getting showcased more and more through out the year. It's just a matter of time.

Anonymous wrote:

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momofcheer wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

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When did all of you parents become coaches? Do you really think as a parent that you know EVERYTHING that goes into becoming a cheerleader? What judges are looking for? Do you know all the technique that goes into becoming a flyer? Do you know what a 2 count transition is? Having that been said, someone that is in the front of the cheer will have to remain in the front if jumps and/or dance follows because there is not time to transition someone all the way to the front? Before you jump to conclusions that coaches are getting free food or whatever, step back and try to look at it as a coach and everything that goes into a routine.

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As a parent I do not profess to have the end all knowledge of cheerleading. However I think parents know a lot more then coaches and cheerleaders think. Remember we sit in the stands for hours and watch routine after routine and see what scores high scores and what does not. We see the routines many times during a competition season. I can defintely tell when someone has higher jumps, sharper motions and great dancing ability and when one does not. There have been many times when I watch routines and see excellent jumpers in the "back" of a routine and girls with lower jumps in the front and wonder why? Could this be favoritsm on the coaches part? Just my opinion but I would have to say so.

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You are so right mommy!!! I hate that too!! Or when they are doing a full and they fall everytime but the still have the last pass. OMG it's like can someone move her pass and put someone who is going to stick it there. These coaches forget we can go read the rules too and most of the parents actually bring the rules with them and the judges point sheets if posted on the websites, so they can assess the teams too. Parents are so gully, you are dealing with the most valuable thing we own, OUR KIDS!! They pay and sit in the stands and shut up days are over.

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First i have to say this topic is sure to get people fired up no doubt.  Second I have to point out that WE DO NOT OWN OUR CHILDREN that is the first misconception they are a gift and they are not material things they are people too... With that said i agree that as parents we have the right to be fired up about unfair treatment to our children no matter where it is. They are precious and they only have one childhood and it is our job and right to protect them!

I was a coach for awhile and of course you have children you just click with that is everyday life you have parents you click with and have a common bond but most coaches do want what is best for the team as a whole if they are playing favorites and you feel like they are hold them accountable go to them and express how it appears to you and let them know you notice certain things maybe they really dont know they are letting their personal likes and dislikes are showing at the gym and no one has ever told them and by all means you have every right to be concerned and every right to expect fair treatment but handle it properly  teach your children how to speak up when something is unfair, but teach them by example to do it with respect

I am at a gym where the owners daughter is on my daughters squad and yes you can see that she gets special treatment sometimes and my daughter came home and gripped of course, but i had to sit her down and explain this little girl is sharing her mommy with everyone and her mom is doing the best she can of course she is her favorite its her daughter  you are my favorite  

and you just really dont know what the purpose is for how they plan the routine.  Some gyms put people in front for skill some for flow of routine, some to push the weakest member more and some base it on how long you have been at the gym  it may not seem fair and in your case it may not even be fair but it is never the parents job to tell the coach how to coach that is their job just like with any other service if you do not like what you are getting take your talented child and you hard earned money to someone who can appreciate her and your concerns
but remember to always handle it iwth dignity your actions speak volumes to your precious child and it will teach them to stand up for what is right as they get older
if you go to a gym and they say they dont have favorites, that is your warning sign everyone has favorites and that ok how they handle it is another story
best of luck to everyone